Love You, Hate You by Charis Marsh

Author:Charis Marsh
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Dundurn Press Limited
Published: 2011-10-13T04:00:00+00:00

In her room, Alexandra heaved her bag onto the bed with a groan. She took her school books out; biology, Hamlet, history.… A paper fell out of her English binder. It was a letter from McKinley inviting any Super Achievers students to submit their accomplishments to be posted on the wall and in the student newsletter. Underneath was a reminder to register if you wanted to perform at the school assembly.

Alexandra sat down on her bed and stared at the paper, biting her lip as she considered. Bronze at the Genees might be considered good by the kids at the academy, but she knew that the others in the Super Achievers program would just want to know why not a gold. A girl in her class had made the gymnastics team for the Olympics, and one of the boys had just missed school because he had a special violin solo performance in New York. Katy had just got back from three months of modelling in Italy. And she hadn’t seen Josh or Emily in weeks because they were filming. And that’s just the things I know about, Alexandra thought, pushing her textbooks off the bed so that they fell to the floor with a crash.

“And as for the assembly performance? Forget it!” She said out loud to her history book. The rhythmic gymnasts would steal the show, like they did every year, and the Evergreen Arts dancers would embarrass themselves by performing, which they did every year and never seemed to realize. No, performing was not an option. Especially if Diana was going to perform. Diana was in the program for opera, and she was incredible. Alexandra groaned and lay on her back, staring at the ceiling. She clenched her hands into fists and punched the pillow. If I’d just gotten gold … but I still wouldn’t have performed, I guess. Ballet couldn’t compete for coolness with rhythmic gymnastics and opera, and she couldn’t risk the fallout if people didn’t think she was any good. She couldn’t endure the embarrassment.

“Alexandra! Dinnertime soon, come and set the table,” Beth called.

“Coming,” Alexandra yelled back. She sighed, feeling her jaw line and cheeks. It didn’t seem possible to just stop. She needed to. She would be perfectly fine, and then suddenly everything would seem too much, she would panic stuff food into her body as fast as she could. It didn’t have to be a lot, just fast. And then, she would have to throw it up. She couldn’t dance on a full stomach, it wasn’t possible. Throwing up made her feel so much better. It calmed her down, made her feel like she was succeeding, even if everything seemed out of control. She could walk out of the bathroom and not feel so inferior, and for a couple minutes nothing mattered so much. It was worth it, just for that feeling. But I have to stop doing it so often, Alexandra thought as she felt her face. What is the point if it makes my face bigger?

She sighed and turned on her laptop.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.